Tuesday, 22 March 2011

Toff Rents Out Front Step To Hobo

When I was walking home last night I saw this guy curled up by Co-op down by Queen's Road. I started off by wondering if I could ask him to move out of the way because I happened to be running low on bread and milk and he was positioned quite awkwardly, with his legs right in the way of the automatic door. Then I got to looking at the guy and I started to feel sorry for him and everything because he really did look very uncomfortable and he had this dog and it was spread out right over his chest and I started to feel sorry for the dog too. 
  So I thought I should do something about it, considering I was feeling so sorry and all, but I wasn't sure if the guy was asleep or drunk or what so I figured I'd have to shout because I didn't want to get close to the fellow in case he was drunk and aggressive and most probably even mad. So I shouted "Hello fellow, what're you doing down there?" and after a few seconds he answered me and he didn't look aggressive or mad and I asked him if it didn't annoy him what with people treading over him all day and night. After a while I stopped trying to understand what he was saying and an amazing idea came to me. The guy was showing me a trick that the little dog could do and I had to interrupt him and the whole time I told him the idea I had this really warm and happy feeling because I was thinking about my porch and how much wider and more sheltered and private this fellow would find it.     So I told him my address and he looked embarrassed I think, what with someone being so kind and everything. I wasn't sure whether he would come and sleep on my porch that night or not but the next morning, when I went out to get the paper and my bread and milk, I was careful to step over him and his little dog without waking them.

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